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Does he love you or is he FAKING IT?
Category: GENERAL
Tags: live love faking stress crisis

Does he love you or is he FAKING IT? How to know for sure...

 



Hey, it's Mirabelle
here ...

As always, I’m going to be completely unmasked and honest
 as I can be about love and men…

And I want to talk to you now about something pretty
important.

Because ...

Have you ever been with a guy ... and on the SURFACE
everything seems great ...

But you just have this feeling of dread that you can't
quite put your finger on?

Like something's wrong ... and you don't know what it is
exactly, but your intuition is telling you SOMETHING'S NOT
RIGHT??

Ever had that?

Yeah. Me too.

In fact, it happened to me recently.

Allan (my husband) and I were just froofing around the
house last weekend, doing housework and just hanging out,
and I kept noticing these ... STRANGE little things going
on.

For instance:

I would walk into the room ... and he wouldn't look up
from what he was doing to say 'hey, baby!' with his
customary huge brilliant smile at the mere sight of me.

He'd just ignore me.

Or I'd say something to him, or ask him a question, and he
wouldn't acknowledge it ... he'd just keep right on
reading the paper like I wasn't even there.

Also, a few times he used a really curt, cold tone of
voice with me, too - as in, 'Can you just load the
freaking dishwasher please?!!'

So, nothing 'huge'.

Nothing 'terrible'.

But I definitely noticed something felt OFF.

Now, I KNOW Allan loves me. I can feel it. (He also tells
me multiple times a day ... so that helps ;)

And BECAUSE I know he loves me, that meant I was able to
talk to him about the 'off' feelings I was having, and ask
him what was going on from his perspective, from a place
of LOVE, CURIOSITY, and CALMNESS ...

... instead of fright, fear, panic, and resentment.

Which means the conversation we ended up having was
gentle, loving, and it actually FELT GOOD when it was
happening.

But if I HADN'T known that he loved me?

Things would have felt a LOT different.

I would have felt panicky.

Scared.

Resentful, probably.

And the conversation we ended up having would have
probably turned into a FIGHT (instead of the loving,
gentle, compassionate inquiry we actually DID have) ...

... because I would have come at it from a place of fright
and hurt, which changes EVERYTHING about the way you
interact with a guy.

The point I'm trying to make is that when you're able to
KNOW FOR SURE how he really feels, you're able to handle
the inevitable challenges and painful interludes of a
relationship much better and MUCH more lovingly.

Which means your relationship won't oscillate violently
from 'fights' to 'happiness' or from 'pain' to 'happiness'
the way so many women's relationships do ...

Instead, you can just feel calm and relatively okay EVEN
WHEN TRULY HEAVY STUFF IS GOING DOWN.

Here's how to KNOW that he loves you, 
so that you don't have to worry...

KNOWING that your guy truly loves you is one of
the best things you can do to keep your relationship
thriving, healthy, and bursting at the seams with love
(instead of simmering away under a mantle of pain, worry,
and argument-feeding insecurities.)

So that's why I wanted to tell you the top ways I KNOW FOR A
FACT that my guy really does love me ...

... even when his actions might be saying otherwise in the
moment.

It's my hope that you can use the following stories and
examples from my life to discover truths about YOUR
relationship and YOUR guy that you may not have noticed
before now.

Cuz, look.

We're all human.

We all have 'off' moments ... 'off' days ... heck, even
'off' MONTHS.

And if you're with a guy, there WILL be times that YOU
feel those bad, scary, hurt feelings too.

Times when those QUESTIONS come into your mind.

I didn't like the way he just looked at me ...

I don't like his tone of voice ...

He hasn't touched me in days ...

Is he ignoring me?

Why doesn't he want to talk to me?

Why did he just get up and leave the room like that
without a word?

What does that cold, closed-off expression on his face
mean for me?

Is he getting bored in the relationship?

Is he angry?

Is everything okay??

AAAAAARGHHHHH!!!

I get it. I've been there.

So now I'm going to tell you the 8 behaviors I look for in
my man that PROVE TO ME that he truly loves me.

And ...

If you're getting these 8 things from your guy, you've got
nothing to worry about - he IS putting you first and he
DOES truly love you (even if your intuition is telling you
otherwise ... and even if he's acting like a cold,
cantankerous, downright disagreeable monster that day,
like mine was ;)

Anyway, enough with the foreplay. Here are the tips.

One: He Treats You with Respect

My first long-term boyfriend, Jeremy, was a real winner
(not).

In fact, that was hands-down the WORST relationship I've
ever had - he cheated on me not once but TWICE ... and yet
I stayed with him anyway ...

For another two miserable, sobbing, agonizing years.

(Hey, I was nineteen. And like I always say ... teenagers
aren't fully cooked humans yet. They're not ready to be
eaten. They're still just DOUGH, instead of the crunchy,
delicious, fully-baked treats they'll one day turn into
(usually around the age of 30.)

Weird side note: did you know that teenager's brains don't
work properly? It's a medical fact. Things are changing in
their brains so fast that they LITERALLY can't make good
decisions most of the time, because their brains are
medically confused.

Crazy, huh?

Anyway, so here's how this relates to RESPECT:

Jeremy would always tell me he respected the heck out of
me.

But that was a LIE.

He could SAY he respected me a million times a day, but
his ACTIONS PROVED OTHERWISE.

He'd do things like ... get angry when I made a 'mistake'.

Constantly tell me that I was doing things (even things
like washing the dishes, for Pete's sake) 'wrong' and that
I should do it 'his way' (the 'better' way, obviously.
Ugh.)

YELL at me when he lost his temper.

Or if I got in a jam - like the time my friend had a panic
attack at our place and I called him for help - he
wouldn't help me. He'd say something like, 'MIRABELLE, I
TOLD you not to invite her over. I TOLD you she was going
to freak out about something. For God's sake, now what are
you going to do?'

It was pretty ugly. And to be honest, my self-esteem and
confidence took a HUGE hit in that relationship, and it
took me a really long time to bounce back from it.

Anyway, so here's what I'm getting at:

A man's respect is KEY to a relationship that works. So
don't be fooled by him telling you he respects you.

Instead, look for his ACTIONS.

For instance, I know Allan respects me, not just because
he tells me he does (which he does all the time), but
because he SHOWS me that he does.

Number one is, he values my opinion. If he's going through
a tough time, having a problem at work or with a friend or
even just having those 'scary thoughts' that crop up out
of nowhere (he and I call these 'brain spiders'), he'll
come to me and ask me for help ...

... and then (this is the best part) ...

... He actually USES MY ADVICE.

Not all the time. But more often than not, he'll listen
carefully to what I say, and then actually USE my advice
to help solve the problem.

You guys, this is HUGE. I know it doesn't sound like
anything out of the ordinary (and in some respects, you
should absolutely be able to EXPECT this from your guy)
...

But the truth is, HAVING HIS RESPECT is one of the biggest
indicators of a man's true feelings for you.

And it's actually relatively RARE.

See, when a man asks for your thoughts and then ACTS on
them, that's like the holy grail of respect.

You might not know this already, but guys actually value
respect more than love. As in, he craves your respectmore
than he craves your love (it's true.)

(One of the most powerful things you can ever say to a
guy? 'I respect the heck out of you.' Try saying it to
your guy at an appropriate moment, and watch how his face
lights up with pleasure that he just can't hide.)

So when he shows you that HE respects YOU?

It means you are truly special to him. That he doesn't
just 'want' you ...

... but he actually VALUES you.

That's a rare and precious thing.

Other pointers:

Does he value your opinion?

Does he listen to and remember things that you say?

Has he ever surprised you when he brings up something that
you mentioned in passing?

Does he allow your outlook on the world to influence and
inspire HIS actions?

The main thing to remember is that having a man's respect
is literally like him giving you the keys to his heart.
Guys are stingy with their respect for a reason - because
it's SO VALUABLE to them.

If your guy demonstrates that he respects you (not just
saying it, but PROVING it ...

... then he absolutely loves you, admires you, and is
PROUD to be with you.

Two: he might not always be there when you WANT him ...
but when you NEED him, nothing can keep him away

When a man loves you, what that means is that you come
first in his life.

Not ALL the time.

But when there's a crisis, or something important comes
up, or you truly need him?

NOTHING will stop him from being by your side and taking
care of you as best as he possibly can.

You will be his priority - and you'll know it.

Example: when I suddenly got incredibly sick a few weeks
ago, I had to Uber down to the doctor's office because we
only have one car and Allan was away at business meetings
in the city all day.

And by the time I got to the clinic, I was literally
sobbing in pain.

I couldn't talk. I hadn't slept. I couldn't eat or even
DRINK (very important) for the last 24 hours because my
throat was just so painful I couldn't swallow.

(I'd literally spent the night with my head hanging over
the side of the bed, drooling into a BUCKET, because I
couldn't swallow from the pain.)

Anyway, so after I'd sat sobbing in the waiting room for
fifteen minutes, pausing every so often to spit painfully
into a disgusting wad of tissues I was carrying with me
...

The doctor told me I'd probably have to go into hospital
for ten days for 'pain management', because there was a
risk I'd become dangerously dehydrated from the
not-drinking thing and would need an IV and morphine.

(!!!)

You can probably imagine that when I came out of the
clinic I was a wreck. I looked like hell. I could barely
walk. And I was sobbing on the pavement, dragging my sorry
butt to the drugstore down the block, like some crazy,
rumple-haired bag lady.

Oh, and I was clutching that big manky wad of snotty,
drooly tissues to boot.

(Glamorous, huh?)

(Also, it was REALLY HOT that day, so my face was burned
red and shiny within about six minutes flat.)

Anyway, as I shuffled down the pavement, I texted Allan to
tell him what the doc had said ...

And within 3 minutes my phone was ringing.

Here's how the conversation went (and this is another way
that I absolutely KNOW he truly loves me, even when he
acts grumpy and aloof sometimes) ...

Allan: "Where are you? What's going on? Do you seriously
have to go to the HOSPITAL? Jesus, are you okay??'

Me: (sniffling): "Yup ... I'm okay ... I just gotta walk
to the drugstore and pick up some painkillers now. (snorts
back some snot and muffles another sob.)"

Allan: "Oh, baby. Holy crap. Do you need me to come get
you?"

Me (uncertainly): "Nooo ...... I can handle it ... Don't
worry, I'll just get the meds and then go to bed."

Allan: "Look, I'm serious. If you need me, TELL ME. I'll
cancel everything right now and come help you. Seriously.
Tell me."

Me: "... Okay, I do need you."

Allan: "GOOD. Wait right there. I'm coming to get you
right now."

Ten minutes later (he must have driven like a lunatic), he
came screeching to a halt by the side of the road, leaped
out of the car, wrapped me in his arms and let me cry all
over his shoulder.

Then he took care of all the prescription stuff himself,
asked the drugstore people to please be as quick as they
could because his wife was in serious pain ... and then he
drove me back to our house and ran me a bath.

Over the next couple days he walked the dog for me, made
sure I had enough liquids, went out and bought ready to
drink protein shakes for me when we discovered I couldn't
eat solid food ...

He just looked out for me, in a way I've never been looked
out for by a guy before.

It was AMAZING.

To put this in perspective, Allan is a VERY busy guy. He
had meetings that entire day. Some of them involved people
who'd flown in from other states especially to talk to
him.

They were IMPORTANT.

But because he loves me, he put me FIRST. So he cancelled
everything (without me having to ask) and spent the entire
day (and much of the following week) looking after me when
he knew I couldn't look after myself.

That's how I know he loves me : )

IMPORTANT NOTE: I'm not saying you should expect a guy to
spend ALL of his time with you, or make big dramatic
gestures like that for no real reason.

(For instance, I wouldn't have expected Allan to cancel
his entire day if I'd just been 'mildly unwell' and was
perfectly capable of taking care of myself.)

Same thing goes for 'little stuff' like ... maybe he's on
a big deadline at work, and you want him to watch a movie
with you instead. Obviously, for NON-VITAL stuff, you
can't expect a guy to cancel his plans to be with you.

(And nor should he.)

But if a guy really does LOVE you, then he will put you
first in his life. He might not always be there when you
'want' him, but when you truly NEED him, he's there like a
flash ...

... and he won't 'punish' you for it, heave any big sighs,
or act like it's a pain in the butt for him.

He'll endure inconvenience to take care of you, will go
out of his way to look out for you, and will WILLINGLY go
above and beyond to make sure you are safe and happy.

If you know you can lean on your guy when the chips are
down and you need him by your side, then that's love. And
don't let ANYONE (including your own fearful little mind)
tell you otherwise : )

***

Sighhh ... so it looks like I had more to say on this
subject than I realized.

And this email is already WAY too long.

So since I don't want to take up your entire day with this
NOVEL of words I've somehow written ...

(Plus, full disclosure, my dog needs to go out for a potty
break now ...)

That means I'm going to have to wrap this up now, and I'll
give you the rest of the love tips in my next email.

I hope this was helpful, and that you have a wonderful
rest of your day : )

Love,

Mirabelle xxx
 
Are you in a Sexless Relationship?
Category: GENERAL
Tags: sex love Masturbation Loneliness Cheating Shame

Great presentation!!  More people have this challenge then is admitted. The Good News is there is a way to fix this challenge!!!

No Sex Marriage – Masturbation, Loneliness, Cheating and Shame | Maureen McGrath | TEDxStanleyPark


Love? Marriage? Sex? Can a married couple have all three? Perhaps it’s unrealistic since so many marriages end in divorce today. Why is that? One reason might be that a reported 20% of all marriages are sexless and that number is rising. Why have we lost the lust in our marriages? Is it technology, is it trust? More importantly, how can we “get back at it” in our marriages today? Maureen McGrath - nursetalk@hotmail.com - hosts the Sunday Night Sex Show on News Talk 980 CKNW. She is a Registered Nurse, Sex Educator and author of “Sex & Health"

.

GOSPEL MUSICAL REVIEW SUN 3 DEC 2017
Category: GENERAL

Welcome to Gospel Musical Review broadcast for Sunday 3 Dec 2017

 

 

visit http://www.gospelmusicalreview.com

 

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